Farewell, Summer

I usually write at night.  After little ones are in bed and the house falls into silence, coming to this space is like dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s.  Like putting the bow on a beautifully wrapped present, closing my day in this space just makes everything feel more complete.  Last night, however, I looked at Chad and told him that I’m not sure when I have ever been this tired.  Waking up early and running, keeping up with three kids that never stop during the day, getting up with a 9 month old who still enjoys middle of the night feedings, and then staying up late to capture it all in this space sometimes leaves this Mama feeling like one more step is impossible.  Last night I surrendered to sleep and left this space untouched.  My head hit the pillow and I entered dreamland faster than Bolt finishes a 100 meter dash.

Friday’s are my day off from running.  One might think sleeping in would be a preferred option, but my body is accustomed to the early morning wake up.  I awoke this morning to a dark quiet house and after a good nights rest, thanks to Chad who took the late night feeding, I felt renewed.  I laid in the darkness of my bed for a moment and listened to the silence before grabbing my computer and creeping out the front porch. 

The neighborhood is dark except for the glow of light streaming from the widows of a few early morning risers.  Chad already left for work and my three little ones are still enjoying the peace of Dreamland.  The crickets are still singing their tunes, but the Mourning Doves have begun to compete for the spot light.  My neighbor, who is taking her youngest son to college this weekend, has just returned home. I imagine she is frantically completing her to-do list before transitioning to this new season of life. 

I come to this space to tell our story.  Of course, most days are nothing spectacular or earth-shattering, but still, I tell it because I want to remember.  I want my kids to know.  I want them to cherish the stories of our lives as much as I do.  As the years have passed I have come to value the little moments as much, if not more, than the big ones.  The everydayness of our lives.  Someday, I imagine Charlie, Chanelle, and Meadow reading these words and thinking. . . I’m so glad she took the time.  Truthfully, even if they don’t I have come to believe that I will never regret recording our memories here.  I think our stories are important to tell. . . the big and the little details. 

This week we’ve had a good mix of it all. 

Last night we visited Charlie’s school and met his teacher.  First grade begins next week.  No big deal, right?  (There is no such thing as no big deal in my mind.)  This year will be another transition for us, as we adjust to Charlie being gone all day every day for the very first time.  I know he’s ready, though he admits he is a little uncertain about it. 

As with any transition, I am prone to resistance, dread, and doing anything I can do to avoid the reality that things are going to change.  This week we have thrown ourselves into the final days of summer in order to squeeze every last bit out of it.  As if it were the last tube of toothpaste, we’ve rolled up the bottom and pressed in so to not waste any of the goodness before we wave good-bye.

Speaking of waving. . . Meadow learned to wave this week. . .

. . . and she practices all of the time.  If you look at her she will raise her tiny arm and wiggle that wrist letting you know she knows how sophisticated she has become with her communication.  She’s a proud little girl, I tell you.

Back to summer days.  Knowing this is our final week of summer break, my senses have been more aware and my heart more keenly engaged to the preciousness of our days.  I’ve intentionally stepped back and have done everything I can to etch our memories on my heart.  Sure, the days have been filled with a lot of normal, but knowing that the curtain is falling on summer days has heightened my awareness.

We’ve slowed down and I’ve taken it it. 

Dipping toes into water and exploring all the goodness summer has to offer has become easier as we’ve prepared to kiss it good-bye.  The “dog days” of summer have passed and suddenly the beauty of this special season has been reignited in my mind. 

I’ve made sure that we didn’t waste time this week.  We have a day and, by all means, we are going to fill it with goodness.  Like earlier this week when we decided to visit a park that we rarely visit.  When we arrived the sun was shining and Charlie and Chanelle explored and and laughed and played.  Charlie, being my more adventurous child, led the way. . .

My heart pounded and said a silent prayer that he would not tumble down this large hill while he rode Chanelle’s big wheel down the bumpy terrain.  After showing off his mad skills to Chanelle several times, he gently prodded her to follow suit.

I was surprised when she finally gave in. . .

I watched with nervous joy as my two oldest laughed and played and especially as Charlie guided Chanelle up and down encouraging her along.  Meadow was with me, though. . .

Why would you want to do that?!

It all ended fine and no one was hurt and the four of us spent the remainder of the morning walking and exploring, and enjoying a beautiful morning at the park.

And these are the days when I feel like the luckiest person in the world.  When I get to watch them from a far and take in their smiles.  Seeing them enjoy one another and enjoy life is unlike any other feeling.  And that is why I am compelled to write about it. However normal and typical these days may seem, these are the days I want to remember.  Just us being us.  Us being together. 

Family reflection photo. . .yes, we are cool.

It is nearly impossible for me not to be aware of the passage of time.  How quickly it is all going and how important it is to soak in the simple moments.  I offer a big thank you to summer and all the goodness that it brought our way.  So much goodness. . .

Next week things are going to change quite a bit, I know.  It will be an adjustment for us all, but I have no doubt that this new season will bring a specialness all it’s own.  I anticipate numerous “girl days” with my girls while Charlie is at school and I am excited to see how Grade One will grow my little (but not so little, anymore) guy. 

We’ve got one last summer weekend to enjoy, though, and I plan to do that.  For now, I just want to say thank you, summer. . .

. . . and farewell.

Little ones are stirring now. . . Have a great weekend!